I'm on a binge lately. My own personal mission to catch every typo and misspelling as far as the eye can see. And I have my super goggles on so I have the advantage of distance.
Caught one today by surprise - ever heard of "an online presents for 30 days?"
Neither have I, but it almost went out the door to customers today. Of course they meant presence, but really READ your crap before you send it. Then have two other people read it. And polish it off by sending it to someone who has no clue about the subject. If there are errors or it doesn't make sense, you will know!
And this was recently printed on a newspaper:
"Missippi's literacy program shows improvement" - an Associated Press story.
That really should have been caught.
Need a red pen?
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Thursday, October 20, 2011
We call her Jenny
Sometimes you cross paths with people, they are in some segment of your life for a short time and you hope you never run into them again. I felt this way about a woman I met on a moms board a couple years ago.
She was part of 1,400 member moms site. And I didn't hate her or dislike her. I just feel I can decide who I spend the moments of my life with and my life moments would be wasted on her. She was somewhat of an attention whore who always had to get the last post on any subject. Even if she never had a clue what she was posting about.
And that wasn't my issue with her either. My problem was her spelling and use of the English language. It was so horrible, reading her posts made my eyes bleed proofreaders marks. I had to constantly refrain from making fun of her. She made it too easy.
Now she is a member of an Online Yard Sale group on Face Book with me. Thankfully, there are almost 3,000 members so I rarely see her posts. Here are a few samples for your reading displeasure. I have a red pen handy should you be inclined to make corrections.
1. looking for a WARM 2x jacket now worried about style or color just WARMPTH!! (warmpth? WTF?)
2. someone has posted homade platess they make in the baby area!!! (tattle-tale typos)
3. are they like RED RED or like red or like oragy red (attempting to describe colors. I'm intrigued by oragy red)
How many mistakes can you find in this rant?
4. I posted my food couppons on there and I traded them for a tv and theese 2 people have posted alot of comments and I feel it may have lost me a sale. they where sayn you can buy them cheaper ect ect Ididnt know that I just want to sale them and try and get my money back from the tv we dont go that way enought for us to use them like I thought. I AM NOT tryn to pull anything over on anyone but I though that was VERY rude of them!
And finally the last line from this post IS the irony of the day from Jenny. She is trying to sell a child's kitchen:
5. no this one doesnt make noises tho I think the nobs click when you turn them..this is a diffrent one. Im still wearching for the PERFECT one to fit in there room i have even redone there room again! Im OCD and a perfectionest so it has to fit just right!
Guess what? She's homeschooling her kids.
No sooner had it posted and she left another morsel:
6. Im deff intrested Im leaven a not for hubby to see if he will give me some money :) dought youd sale it for my last 7.00 lol~~~ (The comment came from her looking for a coat!!!)
She was part of 1,400 member moms site. And I didn't hate her or dislike her. I just feel I can decide who I spend the moments of my life with and my life moments would be wasted on her. She was somewhat of an attention whore who always had to get the last post on any subject. Even if she never had a clue what she was posting about.
And that wasn't my issue with her either. My problem was her spelling and use of the English language. It was so horrible, reading her posts made my eyes bleed proofreaders marks. I had to constantly refrain from making fun of her. She made it too easy.
Now she is a member of an Online Yard Sale group on Face Book with me. Thankfully, there are almost 3,000 members so I rarely see her posts. Here are a few samples for your reading displeasure. I have a red pen handy should you be inclined to make corrections.
1. looking for a WARM 2x jacket now worried about style or color just WARMPTH!! (warmpth? WTF?)
2. someone has posted homade platess they make in the baby area!!! (tattle-tale typos)
3. are they like RED RED or like red or like oragy red (attempting to describe colors. I'm intrigued by oragy red)
How many mistakes can you find in this rant?
4. I posted my food couppons on there and I traded them for a tv and theese 2 people have posted alot of comments and I feel it may have lost me a sale. they where sayn you can buy them cheaper ect ect Ididnt know that I just want to sale them and try and get my money back from the tv we dont go that way enought for us to use them like I thought. I AM NOT tryn to pull anything over on anyone but I though that was VERY rude of them!
And finally the last line from this post IS the irony of the day from Jenny. She is trying to sell a child's kitchen:
5. no this one doesnt make noises tho I think the nobs click when you turn them..this is a diffrent one. Im still wearching for the PERFECT one to fit in there room i have even redone there room again! Im OCD and a perfectionest so it has to fit just right!
Guess what? She's homeschooling her kids.
No sooner had it posted and she left another morsel:
6. Im deff intrested Im leaven a not for hubby to see if he will give me some money :) dought youd sale it for my last 7.00 lol~~~ (The comment came from her looking for a coat!!!)
Friday, September 30, 2011
Just a joke!
Sometimes all you need is a good joke to chuckle about. I hit this one today and it cracked my ass up! Just in time, too. I needed an attitude adjustment!
A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen.
Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, that was an insect."
To which, her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a huge dick like that."
A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen.
Embarrassed, and to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, that was an insect."
To which, her son replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a huge dick like that."
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Last week was Bonus Week for me. What made it special?
It wasn't a day off for the elusive three day weekend.
None of my kids got a full ride scholarship.
I didn't win the lottery.
The LPGA was in town for the Navistar Classic, and as part of the sponsorship, the company I work for has a Inside the Ropes contest. Their charity this year is Wounded Warriors.
I picked the winner Friday. A true God-wink happened. The woman who won asked if it was okay to let her husband and daughter have the prize of walking with the LPGA ladies around the course on the final day. You see, her husband was wounded in Iraq in 2003. Choked me up and made my heart swell. (yes, even my stone cold heart can melt a little)
On Sunday, I saw my winners on ESPN walking with golfer Jennifer Johnson. Loved it! Jennifer is pretty special too. Here is her video on Wounded Warriors.
There is irony here or luck - From more than 100 hometown folks around Prattville Alabama, our winner was a wounded warrior, one of my favorite heros in our country. Not the high dollar athlete or superstar movie icon, but a military man who was willing to give his life for our freedom.
It wasn't a day off for the elusive three day weekend.
None of my kids got a full ride scholarship.
I didn't win the lottery.
The LPGA was in town for the Navistar Classic, and as part of the sponsorship, the company I work for has a Inside the Ropes contest. Their charity this year is Wounded Warriors.
I picked the winner Friday. A true God-wink happened. The woman who won asked if it was okay to let her husband and daughter have the prize of walking with the LPGA ladies around the course on the final day. You see, her husband was wounded in Iraq in 2003. Choked me up and made my heart swell. (yes, even my stone cold heart can melt a little)
On Sunday, I saw my winners on ESPN walking with golfer Jennifer Johnson. Loved it! Jennifer is pretty special too. Here is her video on Wounded Warriors.
There is irony here or luck - From more than 100 hometown folks around Prattville Alabama, our winner was a wounded warrior, one of my favorite heros in our country. Not the high dollar athlete or superstar movie icon, but a military man who was willing to give his life for our freedom.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Suspicious Mini-van Moms Found Loitering
I'm social. You can't tell by the huge numbers of followers I have for this blog or the other two. But I swear on all that is Holy, I am.
I've always liked rummaging around at yard sales, poking my nose into other peoples crap. You never know what might be lovingly displayed on a chunk of plywood and sawhorses on any given Saturday.
But, times, they are a changing.
Lately I've been "Facebook shopping" garage sale items. A friend started a online yard sale group. Several friends are moderators on it. This monster took off. In 24 hours there were 500+ members. And in the past four weeks, we split the group to a kids & baby group with 959 members and regular yard sale group with 1469 members.
Pretty handy for researching items online too! For instance - someone selling a laptop for $1,000. That's right, a cool grand for a laptop on a Facebook yard sale group. I know, WTF? Made it real easy to pull up the brand/model on a few different sites and determine the laptop seller bumped her head hard. I mean, throw in $150 more and you get newer, bigger and warranty!
So, I will now garage sale whenever I feel like it. And selling is easy, too. Just post a pic, price, details and contact info. Then find a meeting place to "make the drop." I say that with humor as I'm sure local authorities are wondering why women all over the area are suddenly loitering in parking lots and exchanging a bag of some sort of substance for cash.
So if you like yard sales and living on the edge, find a yard sale group, make a purchase and go find a parking lot to hang out in.
I've always liked rummaging around at yard sales, poking my nose into other peoples crap. You never know what might be lovingly displayed on a chunk of plywood and sawhorses on any given Saturday.
But, times, they are a changing.
Lately I've been "Facebook shopping" garage sale items. A friend started a online yard sale group. Several friends are moderators on it. This monster took off. In 24 hours there were 500+ members. And in the past four weeks, we split the group to a kids & baby group with 959 members and regular yard sale group with 1469 members.
Pretty handy for researching items online too! For instance - someone selling a laptop for $1,000. That's right, a cool grand for a laptop on a Facebook yard sale group. I know, WTF? Made it real easy to pull up the brand/model on a few different sites and determine the laptop seller bumped her head hard. I mean, throw in $150 more and you get newer, bigger and warranty!
So, I will now garage sale whenever I feel like it. And selling is easy, too. Just post a pic, price, details and contact info. Then find a meeting place to "make the drop." I say that with humor as I'm sure local authorities are wondering why women all over the area are suddenly loitering in parking lots and exchanging a bag of some sort of substance for cash.
So if you like yard sales and living on the edge, find a yard sale group, make a purchase and go find a parking lot to hang out in.
Friday, September 9, 2011
A Shit Storm About Death
So after that last "oh so cruel" post regarding the letter and the death of my sperm doner, there came a shit storm. A storm so strong, and ridiculous all due to death.
Ever notice how death brings out the worst in some people? It can tear a whole God fearing family apart. It starts with the deathwatch, when you notice a sibling eyeing everything in the house. Then subtle hints of "what will we do with this diamond necklace?" or "I've always loved that chair.
Then with the final breath of your loved one, the caring and nuturing sweet people who have stood by your side in tears turn into freaks off a Jerry Springer episode. There is screaming and acquisations, bitter attitudes and a sense of greed. Possessions start to disappear from the deceased persons house. Important papers mysteriously vanish. And so much suspicion!
Some say there is no good that comes from a death. When my mom passed, there was no fighting. In fact, my dad is still having a hard time getting us to take anything, and she died 10 years ago. We grew closer as a family then we ever have been.
The irony to this - my dear mother who did her best to cause strife between us while she was living, brought us together inspite of all her actions for so many years of her life.
Love your family and your friends. Don't linger overly much on material possessions.
Ever notice how death brings out the worst in some people? It can tear a whole God fearing family apart. It starts with the deathwatch, when you notice a sibling eyeing everything in the house. Then subtle hints of "what will we do with this diamond necklace?" or "I've always loved that chair.
Then with the final breath of your loved one, the caring and nuturing sweet people who have stood by your side in tears turn into freaks off a Jerry Springer episode. There is screaming and acquisations, bitter attitudes and a sense of greed. Possessions start to disappear from the deceased persons house. Important papers mysteriously vanish. And so much suspicion!
Some say there is no good that comes from a death. When my mom passed, there was no fighting. In fact, my dad is still having a hard time getting us to take anything, and she died 10 years ago. We grew closer as a family then we ever have been.
The irony to this - my dear mother who did her best to cause strife between us while she was living, brought us together inspite of all her actions for so many years of her life.
Love your family and your friends. Don't linger overly much on material possessions.
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